Well, I'm going to apologize right off the start. I have been so busy with stuff that I kept putting off the blog. Bad blogger!lol I will try and not dissapear like that again... And also, I'll apologize for the entry I'm about to write (I'm not in the best of moods).
As most of you may know, I'm deep into the planning of my September 27th wedding. I was just starting to feel confidant about everything too. I have the church, minister, photographer, reception, food, invites, dresses, flowers, etc all planned or reserved. My cake and DJ are both just about nailed down too. All the major stressors were pretty much out of the way(for now anyways :P) Until of course, I emailed the minister with a few little questions. That short little 3 line email has turned my whole wedding (and my world for the time being) into a stressed out mess!! The 1st question was fine; 3pm is a fine time for my wedding. Yay! now I can print my invites!! 2nd question okay; reading must be from the bible. Understandable, the wedding is being held at a church...sucks I can't use the reading I absolutly fell in love with...but theres always the reception. 3rd question is where my heart stoppped; apparently there are to be NO photos taken AT ALL during my ceremony!! My wedding cannot be captured for me to love and cherish the rest of my life!! What??!!! Back it up Reverend! No pictures at all?? Any of you who know me at all know what a big role photographs play in my life. Those who know me well understand how much they really mean to me, and how CRAZY this is making me!! I seriously started crying reading the email. This really is like the end of the world to me. And yes mom-it really IS a BIG DEAL! UGH!
Okay, okay. I've taken a few deep breaths and a nice big sip of my, ummm, coke and coke. I'm a bit calmer. But honestly, is this normal? My mom said it was like this at her wedding too. They just pose you after the fact, and photograph away. That doesn't make me feel the remotest bit better by the way, in fact, it makes me kinda mad! (another large sip) I don't want to fake my wedding pictures. That is sooo wrong to me. How do you recreate raw emotion?? I want a pic of me walking down the isle. I want Josh's expression captured the first time he sees me in my dress. You can't fake that! You can't recreate that! I want to see my real tears when I start crying like a baby on the alter (you know I will). I want to see my dad give me away. These pictures are supposed to capture my ceremony, not some creepy theatrical performance of it. (And please, don't let this offend anyone that may have, like my parents, and appaarently me, had to get their precious memories captured this way. These are my own personal feelings about my wedding....very emotional feelings right now, perhaps a teensy bit irrational. You be the judge. You have my full permission.)
I dunno ladies (or gentlemen), is this the norm? Am I doomed to "redo" my ceremony after the fact for the sake of my pictures? Do I suck it up and move on? Or do I start looking for a new minister, and new church? I do really love the church by the way. My girls were baptised there, thats the family church, and its very cute and "homey" feeling. Please help me!! Be the voice of reason....or outrage along with me ;) Thanks for listening!!
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
Sorry...
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9 comments:
That is the most awful thing a bride could hear! But, at least you will have pictures in your head of your special day...and lots and lots of pics at the reception with everyone smiling and having an awesome time because they all love you and your family! I know what you mean...it would be upsetting but just try to look at the bright side...You're getting married to the man you love!!
Wow, Ash! I can't believe that. I can't see that being the norm, but I am not married so maybe I shouldn't say. But wow, that WOULD be devastating, and while I was reading that I was thinkging "find a new CHURCH!" Of course that is entirely up to you. I guess what you need to think about now is, what is more important to you and yours: getting married in a place you initially didn't think twice about, or capturing every special moment of the one day that will forever be in your heart and memory. You're right, natural poses are, well- natural! If it was me, I wouldn't do it.
Jess
OH MAN THAT SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I would be very very upset too!! Real crappy!!
Kelly
that's absurd! is that really the norm with some churches/ministers? was there an explanation given? I would explain to the minister how you feel and see if he/she will budge. If not, for me I'd start looking somewhere else but that's just me. Like you I LOVE pictures and I look at my wedding pics ALL the time and can't wait to show the boys when they are older. It wouldn't be the same if they were "posed" like you mentioned. I guess you have to decide just HOW important this really is to you (and Josh too I guess LOL) and go from there.
You are NOT over-reacting so whatever you want to do is the right thing to do and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
You WILL fix this Ash and you'll have the wedding you always wanted!
Thanks for all your support ladies! I have been in contact with the minister again, and we've cleared up a few things. The photographer can take pictures without a flash and from a distance so as not to disturb the ceremony, or distract anyone. I beleive by ceremony he means strictly while hes speaking....etc. I can live with that. I'll still get Josh's expression, the aisle walk, etc because thats before the ceremony. I think it'll be okay afterall. The minister is a good guy, and I'm sure we can come to some kind of agreement. He told me its never been a problem before (and hes done lots of weddings) and for me not to worry. So, i won't. We meet with him again the end of August to go over the ceremony specifics and all. I'll just be sure to voice my concerns then, and i'm confidant we'll all get what we want. Plus, I don't have the energy to get all worked up about it over and over. I'll get my pictures because its my wedding, and in the end, everyone (minister included) wants me to be happy. I am marrying the man I love, and it will be perfect for us!
oh thank god i just read your reply ...i was about to go POSTAL !!LOL that would definitely not fly with me either ..i mean why hire a photographer if ya can't take pictures of the ceremony. lol definitely find your middle ground with the minister. It's your wedding and so you should get exactly everything you dreamed about ...Glad to see things are coming together for the both of us !!
Oh my! Just read the post now.. glad things have got sorted out though! That would be so very hard to accept NO pics at all during the ceremony. I was going to say, don't worry, Cindy will get the pics taken slyly... hehehe like she did at my wedding! God love her! And you :p Who is doing your photography anyway? It's great it will be in the afternoon too! Lots of natural light through the windows :)
WHEW! I was getting a little worried that I'd have to take all the pictures for you from my seat!!!! I'm glad you've found a compromise...otherwise I would have strongly suggested finding a new place to be married since I know that the pictures would mean so much to you (I know they did for me!). A good photographer with a good camera should have no trouble taking good shots during the ceremoney (they can do that, right...just no flash?) and your wedding will be beautifully captured!
oh thank goodness at least you can some good shots at the wedding!!
Kelly
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